253. Improving Poor Sexual Response
The term frigid may be out of date, but many women today occasionally have problems with vaginal dryness, uncomfortable or painful intercourse, or other effects of poor sexual response. After having an evaluation by a doctor to rule out medical problems, couples can practice certain techniques to remedy sexual unresponsiveness in a woman. A few simple methods follow.
-
1.For the first week, limit lovemaking to cuddling, kissing, and nuzzling. Don’t touch the genitals or breasts.
-
2.During the second week, the man should gently touch his partner’s vaginal area during lovemaking but stop before she reaches orgasm, to increase vaginal lubrication.
-
3.During the third week, repeat the first two phases, then proceed with intercourse. If the vagina isn’t adequately lubricated, apply a water-soluble lubricant, such as K-Y brand jelly to the penis to facilitate penetration. (Penetration may also be easier if the woman is on top.)
If a tight vaginal opening still makes penetration painful or impossible, the following exercise may help.
-
1.The woman should gently place the tip of her partner’s little finger against her vagina and gently push his finger into her vagina. If this feels uncomfortable, she should stop and wait a few minutes.
-
2.The couple should continue this exercise until the man can insert two fingers in his partner’s vagina without causing pain or discomfort. (It may take several attempts over a period of weeks for this technique to work.)
If a woman remains sexually unresponsive despite these measures, professional therapy may be worth considering. (See Tip 265.)
