1. Your Emotions and Your Health

178. Overcoming Jealousy

It’s normal to feel a little jealous if a co-worker is promoted to a position you covet or if someone flirts with your spouse. But if you’re so jealous that you’re miserable and preoccupied with resentful thoughts, jealousy can be debilitating.

Jealousy arises from the belief that others are better off, from fear of losing someone (or something), or from distrust of others.

To control or overcome jealousy:

1. •Admit to yourself that you feel jealous. Only then can you begin to deal with your feelings constructively.
   

2. •Be happy for others’ gains and accomplishments, and use your jealousy in a positive way by motivating yourself to achieve what you admire in others.
   

3. •Remind yourself of your own unique qualities.
   

Unfounded jealousy can ruin a marital or romantic relationship. If you find yourself thinking suspicious thoughts about your spouse or lover, distract yourself by doing something constructive like a home repair project. Also, don’t make it a habit to check up on the other person or question his or her activities or companions.