Systematic Stress Management Program

Step 7: Communication & Stress Section

Improving Your Ear-Q

Image of friends sitting and talking to eachother.

The following are recommended ways to build your listening skills.

•  Take 51% of the responsibility for understanding what is being said.

•  Look for areas of personal interest in what is being said.

•  Plan to report the conversation back to someone else.

•  Maintain the proper attitude. Keep an open mind.

•  Stand or sit close to the speaker.

•  Listen for the speaker’s meaning.

•  Identify the speaker’s purpose by looking for central themes or ideas.

•  Avoid becoming defensive.

•  Limit and overcome distractions. Pay attention.

•  Go to a lecture and just listen.

•  Practice active listening skills: paraphrasing, clarifying, and giving feedback.

•  Take notes on something you’ve heard.

•  Commit yourself to better listening.

Listening Exercises

Exercise #1: List 3 new skills you’d like to try to become a more effective listener.

 

Exercise #2: Ask someone to tell you a 3 - 5 minute story. Use the three skills of active listening (paraphrasing, clarifying, and feedback) as well as the skills listed in “Improving Your Ear-Q.” Ask the storyteller to rate you as a listener afterward.

 

Scoring – The score is based on the speaker’s assessment of the 3 - 5 minute exchange.

3 = Used the skill well

2 = Made an effort to use the skill

1 = Needs improvement

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